How your relationship affects your smoking

Monday, August 19, 2013

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Having a baby is a time when you and your partner will have many changes in your life. Your habits and routines will change, and this can include how you relate to each other about smoking. This can change your relationship for better or worse with each other. The types of changes may depend on your behaviors before you got pregnant.

Although every couple is different, all couples tend to fall into one of four types of patterns. Do any of the patterns below sound like you?

Supports You

This is a pattern where both partners see smoking as a problem because of health, financial, or other reasons but also recognize that trying to quit smoking can be difficult. Regardless of who is smoking in the relationship, each of you tries to be supportive and understanding in the quit attempt. After Jada became pregnant, she told Mike she wanted to quit smoking for the baby. Mike promised he would stop smoking around the house and that he would keep his cigarettes out of her reach. Mike also joined Jada at all her appointments so they could discuss quitting with their doctor. Jada is also trying to help Mike quit before the baby comes.

Does What You Want

This is a pattern where both partners see smoking as okay and make sure there are chances to smoke as part of their everyday activities. This is true even if only one partner smokes. Even though Dave doesn’t smoke, he accepts that Eve does and that it helps her relax. He doesn’t mind stopping to buy her cigarettes. He thinks that smoking is an important way for Eve to unwind and relieve her stress. He also knows that smoking helps Eve to be social at get togethers and when hanging out with friends.

Ignores You

This is a pattern where both people see smoking as a choice each person makes on their own, and they don’t care if the other person smokes. Even if they both smoke, they often smoke when they are not with each other. Michelle doesn’t talk about her smoking with Tom. They both smoke but feel it isn’t something they need to discuss; they feel like it is no one else’s business. They both smoke with co-workers on breaks and when they hang out with their own friends. She and Tom both smoke in the house but usually when they are doing their own thing and not together.

Argues With You

This is a pattern that causes tension and sometimes arguments between the partners. Jen’s partner, Mitch, does not smoke. He is always bugging Jen about her smoking and tells her that “she stinks.” Sometimes he won’t even be near her or kiss her when she has been smoking. Jen feels like Mitch is being a jerk and is hurt by the way he acts. Whenever she can, Jen likes to get away and smoke in peace.

Although it’s your decision to continue to smoke or quit, how your partner acts also affects you and your smoking. Take our relationship quiz to help you understanding your pattern and how it may affect your quitting smoking.

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